Here we want to share some information which might help you to take that step.
The Cycle of Change or Readiness to Change
One study on changing habits came up with this 'Stages of Change' model:
Task
- Look at the model below and see if you can identify which phase you are in now.
- Pre-Contemplation. No intention on changing behaviour.
- Contemplation. Aware a problem exists but no commitment to action.
- Preparation. Intent on taking action to address the problem.
- Action. Active modification of behaviour.
- Maintenance. Sustained change, new behaviour replaces old.
- Relapse. Fall back into old patterns of behaviour.
Have you found the phase you are in now? If yes, the next step is to work out what you need to do to move to the next one.
Task
- Can you list three things you need to do to move into the next stage?
- Now give yourself a deadline for each one.
Continue doing this until you reach the 'Action' stage of the model.
You will need to identify the barriers you face to making the changes you want. Then you will need to come up with some solutions that work for you.
Barriers to Change
There are many reasons you may find it difficult to implement change into our lives. These barriers can often become part of everyday life, so that you cannot see a way forward. It can be helpful to take a step back and try to view the situation from a different point of view. What advice would you give your friend if they struggled with that issue?
Common barriers include time, finances, work, family life, childcare, motivation, lack of support and low self-confidence. It is down to you to find solutions that work in your daily life, not just for short periods of time. Consider how you can make this a long term change to your lifestyle.
Small changes are just as good as big changes! In fact they are better, as they are likely to be kept up with in the long term.
Remember, if you want a different outcome, such as to lose weight or become fitter, something has to change!
Task
- List the main barriers in your life and be specific.
- Order them in priority with 1 being the most troublesome.
- Now think of two solutions to each barrier.
- Which solution are you most likely to put into practice?
- Now give yourself a realistic deadline to address each barrier.
| Barriers | Priority | Solution 1 | Solution 2 | Chosen Solution | Realistic Deadline |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Example: Long hours at work. | 1 | Go for a walk in lunchtime. | Park further away from office and get up from desk often (aim for every 45 mins). | 2 | Two weeks from today. |
How to deal with setbacks
A setback or relapse is a normal part of behaviour change, as at some point you may go back to old habits.
First of all, it is important to note, that this does not mean you return to old habits forever. It may simply be that you go on holiday and are not as careful as you have been. This does not mean you have failed! After a relapse, you need to get back on with our new habits, without feeling guilty or like you have failed. This can start straight away, you do not have to wait until Monday!
What tends to happen is that you relapse and feel like you have ruined everything. You feel you have failed and that there is no point in carrying on with your new habits. So, you spiral downward, until at some point you reach the 'Pre-Contemplation' stage again.
What you need to do is make that relapse a tiny part of your journey. It might be one day or one week and then you get back on with your new habits.
Over time, these new habits will become a "normal" part of your life.
Task
- Identify three areas that typically set you back from healthy habits. For example, holidays, Christmas, illness and such.
- List what you can you do in advance to prepare for these setbacks. (Such as, be organised after a holiday. Have planned meals and healthy food in the cupboard.)
- List what can you do to help yourself get back on track if things do not go to plan. It is not a disaster! Consider ways to deal with your emotions. Take a more relaxed view and the practical steps you can take.
Setting Goals
This can be a useful way to keep motivated and see your progress. Try to set goals for the short, medium and long term. You will see how each one builds on the one before to get you where you want to be.
It may be helpful to work backwards and think about your long term goal first and then break it down into little steps. Conversely, if that is too overwhelming, think about what one thing you can change this week and then build on it week by week.
When setting a goal, be really specific. Then it is clear what you are trying to achieve and when you have achieved it. So, feel fitter or lose weight are not that helpful. Try to answer these:
- What do you want to achieve?
- When do you want to achieve it by?
- How will you achieve it?
- Why do you want to achieve it?
- You could even include, who will support you?
Task
Set yourself a short, medium and long term goal
| Goal | What | When | How | Why | Who |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Short term | |||||
| Medium term | |||||
| Long term |
Self-perception, confidence and self-esteem
Our past history of "failed" behaviour change can often contribute to negative self-belief and reduced confidence in our ability to make successful changes. So, the more times you diet and then regain weight, the more likely your self-esteem will fall.
How you view yourself can have a major effect on how you think, behave and feel. This all affects the choices that you make. If you feel worthy and consider yourself enough of a priority to make changes for, these are important things.
Setting goals and achieving them can help to improve self-confidence and self-esteem. Although, sometimes you must look deeper than this to make lasting change.
It can be useful to keep a diary. Write down when you feel certain emotions and what affect that has on the choices you make. You can then identify patterns of behaviour. When you can clearly see these, you can plan solutions to deal with that behaviour. Then, the next time it happens, you can pause and think again what your next move will be.
Another way to deal with negative thinking is to write a gratitude/positive diary. This involves writing three things that you are grateful for or positive things about yourself at the end of each day. They may be nothing to do with your weight management or physical activity goal, but simply things that relate to you. Often, you do not see the positive attributes you have, so doing this can help to bring this to the fore.
Task
List three positive things you have achieved, feelings you have felt or deeds you have done today.
Motivation
This can be the elusive element to behaviour change that you are searching for. Sometimes you have it and sometimes you struggle to find it.
So, what can you do to help yourself?
Firstly, identify the reasons why you want to make a change. These have to be strong enough to pull you forward into action.
Then, consider what your life will be like if you do not make a change. These reasons need to be strong enough to push you forward into action.
Task
Create a table like the one below and complete it, be specific.
| Reasons to change | What will life be like if I do not change? |
|---|---|
Between the two lists, you should have enough reasons. However, this is not the end of the story. You have to find something within yourself that makes it meaningful to you. No amount of outsider intervention can do this, this is for you and you alone. And that is what makes behaviour change so difficult.
To help you along the way, you can complete all the other tasks in this resource. Hopefully, that will give you the practical guidance you need, but in the end it is down to you.
Having support around you is beneficial. Do it with someone or confide in a friend or family member. This will tend to make you feel less isolated and alone. It can also help to bounce ideas off other people and get their thoughts and suggestions too.
Remember, do what you can, be realistic, make small changes and be kind to yourself.